Net Roster Order

While 90% of my ham radio experiences have been positive these last ten year there are still times I think maybe I should hang up the mic.Now I have felt most comfortable on PSK, but I started out on 2 meters just like most hams. Now in the beginning the other hams were just as nervous as I was talking over the air. Then I started to become morerelaxed and that made things a bit easir, on both ends of the repeater. I have my good days annd my bad days, but it is very seldom I get heated over ann overincident, tonight during the RACES Net I choked
The format of the net recently changed. The old way was the net control went down a list of stations and I usually fo-llowed the same persopn. Recently that changed to what's known as "Net Roster" order, meaning you have to listen to the entire order not to miss your spot. Well I thought the trick was to write down every station. So I started typing every station down and the signed on. The problem was I lost one of the stations and lost my place. That screwed me up and I panicked. What's worse is I flew off the handle, a common occurance.
Now frequent readers of the blog will tell you when I get upset I blow up and then regret later. Tonight it happened over the air, I feel horrible. People say there's more people listening than talking. Well one of my transmissions tonight was totally unprofessional. It only happened for a second, but that's all it takes. I was very upset and once again I didn't know how to control. I let that good old anger get the better of me once again. Now the other folks on the net are great but I screwed them up too, that turned a bad situtation worse. I threw the mic down and that was it.
Now the once a year in person meeting happens to be this weekend, so again my timing fpor this episoded co uldn't khave been worse. Althoough the net control did e-mail me and said not to worry about it. The last thing that went through my mind is I had to write this down>
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